For St. Jude

This is going to be tough! I’m doing the Jog 30 Miles Challenge for St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital and your contribution will help St. Jude find cures and save children! Thank you so much for your support.

https://www.facebook.com/donate/626192299180231/?fundraiser_source=external_url

!!! Update !!!

I received my first donation thanks to a fellow blogger here on WordPress, http://susiesopinions.blog

Current Obsessions

Taking Care of Health Concerns, Physical and Mental

September will be a busy month for my health. I got my City insurance benes so I have a lot of putting off to catch up on. I had insurance through my husband but knowing that I would soon reap the rewards of having benefits through my work I just waited on things.

I already got back to the dentist (I hadn’t been since December, yikes!)

I started back in therapy (although that has nothing to do with my health benefits).

My vision has gotten a lot worse over the last couple years. It seems like things changed for the worse during the pandemic when I was home more and subsequently on my phone and watching tv more too. I’ve always needed vision correction so maybe it’s age. Either way, that is on the agenda for September. Plus, my glasses are so old now. They’re cute but I need a different shape. It’s possible it will be recommended I wear correction more often in which case maybe I’ll go back to contacts. I wore contacts years ago. High school probably, likely earlier than that even. Remember all the different colored lenses you could get? I tried all the options. Can you still get those?

Anyway…

The biggie (well, besides the therapy thing, that’s a pretty important one for me) is that I also have some health stuff that I won’t go into detail about but some issues that need some exploration and likely will require surgery so I’m going to start tackling that unpleasantness this coming month as well.

Reality TV

Always and forever!

I’ve been a reality TV lover since the Real World on MTV. I remember being little and wanting to be on it when I was older. I still try to watch The Challenge series but there are so many seasons, 1 after the other and now they’ve included people into the competition that aren’t former Real World or Road Rules crew. It’s hard to keep up.

I feel confident in saying that the whole Real World, Road Rules, Challenge franchises is one of the best in TV history.

My all time favorite reality show is the Real Housewives franchise. Bravo series in general almost always reel me in! I love watching most of the Housewives although it’s impossible to watch them all, similar to the Challenge seasons I was referring to above. There are just too many!

I’m almost ashamed to admit that I have yet to really get into the Atlanta ladies. I’ve watched here and there and kept up somewhat but I really need to make the time one of these days to commit to watching the whole series. I know it’s one of the most successful of the franchises and that I’m missing out.

I just got done rewatching old New York episodes. The Bethenny years are really the only ones that are worth watching in my opinion. I watched Season 7 when she returns after a 3 year hiatus. This is the “Be Cool, Don’t Be All Uncool” season and arguably one of the greatest seasons of all Housewives ever.

It makes me happy to watch the old New Jersey episodes during the Caroline and Jacqueline years. From Season 3 on probably, after Melissa and Joe arrived. I think New Jersey is the only one that I could rewatch every season. Except maybe the one with the twins. They were on the season that Teresa was in jail. Then again, it has been so long and I don’t have a clear memory of it so who am I kidding, I could probably rewatch that season too! One of the reasons I love New Jersey is, well actually two come to mind. One is that they film during the holidays. Old episodes would film DURING Christmas and I love the traditions they showcased and the family element during that time of year. The other is that they showcase the family drama and dysfunction. Other series don’t show that as in your face as they do, with your own flesh and blood. I can relate to toxic family drama so I guess it’s kind of nice to see it in action and feel better about my own stuff. Ha!

Salt Lake City was a winner from Day 1 for me too.

My child

Always and forever!

There’s nothing to really even explain or go into detail about, is there? He is my current obsession and will be an obsession of mine every day for the rest of my life for no reason at all! OH but I will share a quick little clip I snagged of him this weekend. One of his own obsessions is the Peanuts franchise. Snoopy, Charlie Brown, all of that. They have multiple series on Apple TV+ that he likes to watch. I, myself, have gotten obsessed with the idea of making him a Peanuts-themed 4th birthday party in January. Anyway, he learned how to say “Good Grief Sally.” I personally think it’s one of the cutest things I’ve ever seen but I’m impartial!

Podcasts

In the mornings when I get ready for work is when I’m able to get the most podcast time in. I enjoy many podcasts but keeping with the positive theme of this blog post I will share with you my favorite comedy podcasts. I have 3 go-tos:

SmartLess hosted by Jason Bateman, Sean Hayes and Will Arnett. They have on a plethora of different kinds of guests. Between the 3 of them they seem to know everyone.

Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade. These guys focus a lot on SNL and I believe most, maybe all, of their guests are from SNL over the years as well.

Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend. He is ridiculous and also has on a plethora of different kinds of guests. He seems to know everyone also but for very different reasons than the guys from SmartLess, obviously.

There is never a dull moment when you listen to these guys. These podcast choices aren’t a focused listen. If you enjoy listening for the ease of it and for the purpose of making you laugh than you will want to check them out!


What are you obsessing about right now? Any reality TV or funny podcasts I am missing out on?

Until the next one,

💛 Katie

Self Confidence. Baby Steps.

Love yourself more

I saw this old friend (that I just keep in touch with on social media nowadays) post something in the new year regarding trying to love herself the way she is, along with a selfie. This was a fairly general post, meaning, I could create any kind of backstory I wanted as to what inspired her to post it. Who knows what is/was going on in her personal life. Selfies are such a common thing. It was the words she posted along with the selfie that sparked some kind of inspiration in me that I didn’t really know I needed.

Devote this year

I am not a big selfie taker. One could think it is a millennial thing; a way for one to show off their good looks. A self confidence is something I inherently assumed many selfie takers have. Filters help with self confidence, of course. Then I began to think about why I don’t post many. I began to question my self confidence. I am, technically, a millennial. I should like taking selfies! After all, I like social media and reality TV like the stereotypical millennial.

I like posting photos of myself, but with my hubby included. I have a certain side I prefer because of insecurities when we post a photo together. In my mind, he’s always been my arm candy. I then start to realize I don’t have much self confidence. I guess it’s not such a shock, maybe just something I’ve been able to not focus much attention on. I go on to realize that maybe I never have. I was chubby when I was little, and made fun of for it. I never had many boyfriends during grade school. I was always in choir and not part of the “cool” crowd. I was never asked to a dance. It wasn’t until I grew up, and looking back, gained some confidence, before guys noticed me. I had more friends, and quite frankly, a lot more fun.

So as simple as that, I think about that post from my old friend, and decide I will make a small change. I will follow her #noselfshaming #lovethebodyImin lead and start by taking more selfies! Loving the body I’m in might be a little harder, and take a little longer. I can, however, immediately stop analyzing every little thing about my pictures and just start sharing them because its about the experience I’m having, or the emotion I’m feeling, not the way I look. Nobody cares about the insecurity I have but myself. If this means me using more filters at first, then so be it.

I’m fairly reserved about what I post on social media. I often go through and delete things later that aren’t necessary. A photo, often reshares/reposts on Facebook, or things I personally share/post. I don’t plan to change that, I will never be the millennial that makes my whole life public. When I look through these photos and posts, though, it is rarely a photo of me, or an accomplishment of mine. I want to look at my Instagram and see more photos of me… just me. I want my Facebook profile picture to be of just me.

Then, just because this is how I am, my thoughts keep going. I begin to think that this revelation could encourage me to get the courage to conquer lots of things that I’m scared of, that I truly believe are no reason fears. Things like heights, for example. Why am I scared of heights? I’ve made a lot of compromises for this fear, so I’m not really cutting myself enough slack, but I don’t remember some single event that made me scared. I also created, somewhere as I’ve gotten older, this fear of bridges. STUPID, POINTLESS FEAR! I live in Portland, I can’t cross any of the beautiful water surrounding this area without crossing a damn bridge!

On a serious note, I am hoping that it will give me some courage to tackle health fears of mine. Athleticism has never been my thing. As I’ve blogged about before, I’ve tried many sports. Running, not my thing. I ran a 5k though, last month. Not being athletic has never stopped me from trying things, but I think I haven’t been successful because of some fear. I’m the one who gets red in the face. I have these memories of being required to run the mile in elementary school and never being able to run the whole thing. They took this pincher thing and measured stomach and under arm fat. Pull ups were a requirement, as well, and an exercise I always have been unable to do. These memories seem more traumatizing than ones that have instilled this fear of failure in me. Maybe it has done both.

I have PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). I’m hearing about this health issue more and more. It looks different on every woman, meaning we all show different side effects. You can find out some of the basics pretty easily online; here is one website for those interested: “http://www.pcosaa.org/pcos-symptoms/”. The approach I have adopted to healing myself is a holistic one. Diet, exercise, supplements, etc. I’ve made progress in the past, right after being diagnosed and was told I am at risk of becoming a diabetic if I continue with the diet and exercise routine I was currently using. Maybe it’s more accurate to say the lack of exercise I was practicing along with the sugar intake that was included in my diet at the time. When I saw progress, I was trying to eat paleo, exercise more frequently, drink less, and saw a naturopath regularly. Then some major life changes happened, some specific events, and I strayed away from this. Kind of fell back into old habits, as so many of us do. It may sound like a bit of a stretch that something such as taking more selfies could help me get back on track. You’re not going to take them if you don’t like how you look due to the weight you are at. Or due to the way your skin looks. I need any help I can get at loving myself. I never felt better when I was really taking care of my body.

I wonder, too, again, as I’ve mentioned in previous blog posts, if my lack of self-confidence is due to feeling a lot of rejection. Some people seem to post more in their insecure state, as a way to get approval. I react the opposite. I almost want to become as invisible as possible in order to not have to worry about ever being rejected again. And maybe this answers the question as to why I feel like I don’t have a lot of support left around me. Maybe, partly, I’ve made it that way.

Selfie

This is how bad I am at selfies, first of all! I caught a nice smile though, and that is what I am loving about this one!!

Well, we’ll see how it goes! As the title says, Baby Steps. I’ll try to take more selfies. I’ll try to not critique and analyze them. I’ll try to post them more. I’ll see if my theory works. If it starts to slowly crumble some of the walls I’ve built around myself. Maybe I will be inspired to take control of  my health again. Maybe I will be so inspired that I will work so hard that I will be able to finally do a pull up! Maybe I’ll have to start a little blog series around my progress. And just because I need to be more forgiving of myself… maybe this theory won’t work. Something will work, it has do. I’m ready. I will never lose hope. Baby Steps.