Hello from Pacific City, OR

It’s my birthday!!!

The last year in my 30s. The three of us drove over to the coast yesterday to spend 5 days to celebrate.

It didn’t take long after arrival for me to completely loose it and break down bawling my eyes out. I think it was just a release which is an out of character reaction for me. I really needed to get out of town and spend some quality time with the ocean.

Here comes a bitch, moan, gripe, whine session. Skip to the next paragraph if you’re not interested. My day to day life is such a grind. Both my husband and I working 40 hours a week while my son is in preschool the whole time. He thankfully loves it at school but we’re only together a few hours before bedtime each day and then we all do it over again. My child is hilarious and I love him endlessly. He’s my favorite person but he is a needy mother f*kr and that is as nicely as I can put it! There is no breaks from him, My workplace is under investigation for misconduct. I had an interview with the investigator on Wednesday right before leaving on vacation. Lucky me!! I’m happy this is finally happening though. That environment has been toxic for over a year (yet I’m still going every day out of obligation.) Being a home owner is great, I feel lucky. However the house we bought is so old and damn near everything needs updated. The most recent project we’ve been working on is the backyard. The yard is gravel and sand which is not conducive to our lifestyle. I want grass! So we’ve been shoveling and wheelbarrowing out loads of this stuff. Luckily a lot of people want the mix for drainage. I’ve been posting it on Facebook Marketplace and it’s been going quick. Were done (enough) as of Memorial Day weekend. I found some free sod (also on Facebook Marketplace) so we rented a rototiller and purchased some compost. Last weekend we were able to get the grass installed! It was only about enough for half the yard but an improvement none the less. It’s been a lot of work on top of only ever working! Life is just a lot and it’s been a long time since I’ve been able to escape it. I’m so happy to be here.

Today has had the most perfect weather. I’m sitting inside the rental as I type this with the windows open listening to the ocean. I found a place on a quiet dead end road. We’re a couple houses down from the trail that opens up to the beach that so far has been nearly empty. There’s a family of bunnies roaming around. It’s pretty idyllic so far. I have a book to read, some more writing ideas in my drafts and a few more days left to unwind.

I enjoy growing older. It scares me a bit but I appreciate the luxury of it. This year in particular feels important. In normal circumstances I’d dive into this feeling of importance further but I’m not going to today. I owe it to myself to analyze less, think less, worry less, stress less on my birthday. However, I do love a good analyzing session so it’s likely I’ll write out the details soon, HA!

For the evening, I’ll leave with a quote I found by Kahlil Gibran

“There must be something strangely sacred in salt; its in our tears and in the sea.”

🎉 Katie  🤍